Soo the problem with depression…(well there are a lot of problems with depression obviously, but i am not going to list them) is that when someone asks you ‘whats up?’ and you say ‘nothing’ or ‘i dunno’, you are actually telling the truth. To me the only thing worse in the world than feeling constantly sad, is not knowing why. Sometimes i get so annoyed, i wish something bad would happen just so i have a reason to be sad, or at least something to tell people when they ask.
I was thinking about how to describe depression the other day. I found a quote that said it was like ‘drowning but not being able to die’…i can relate to this.. but for me it’s not like that all the time. If we use the drowning analogy: Imagine you are in a computer game, and the only thing you have to do to win, is keep swimming…you are a strong swimmer so it doesn’t seem so hard…trouble is, you have a large weight attached to your feet pulling you down…some days the weight is light, some days heavy, but as long as you keep swimming you’ll be fine. However hard you try, eventually, you get tired of swimming and start to sink………………………….. Like in all good computer games tho, after drowning comes another life!!….and the whole process starts all over again! Often i think about it like this and it doesn’t seem so bad… as long as you can acknowledge the issue before you forget how to swim.